CHECKLIST: Ten places to take your partner when she’s pregnant

When a woman is pregnant, she feels like she will be pregnant until the end of time. Her pregnancy feels like the longest, most difficult pregnancy ever experienced. That’s because it is; and as a partner, never try to dispute this.

When the baby comes, the world changes, and everything you used to do becomes just that little bit harder. There will be a whole lot of places that you suddenly stop going, or that you only make it to once a year.

Even if you do go anywhere with the baby, it’s a completely different experience. Gone are the times a mother can just sit and be and soak up the quiet ambience of wherever she is. From now on she is hyper-sensitive that her child is bothering other people, or she has to leave quickly because she is covered in vomit, or she sneezed and accidentally wet herself.

So, before the baby comes, here are a list of places you should take your partner. This list is by no means exhaustive, and a good partner would use it only as an inspiration point for many other wonderful outing ideas to follow.

#1 To the baby shop

A lot of soon-to-be mums really enjoy shopping for baby stuff, and would prefer to do so with their girlfriends or their mums. Some love to do it alone, and will do it quite a few times. But it’s a really good idea to, at least once, take your partner when she wants to the baby goods store.

There are a few reasons why this is a good idea. Because baby stuff can be ridiculously expensive, for one thing, and you may want to have some say in the budget, or if certain items are actually needed at all.

You might want to choose what the cot looks like, or guide your partner to gender neutral items if you don’t actually know the sex yet. It is also a very good idea to have some say in a couple of items, and actually learnhow to use them, such as the pram or the capsule or carseat.

Silly stereotypes aside, as a partner you should be involved with this, and a lot of women don’t want to do this without you (or at all), so man up and go baby shopping.

#2 For a walk

Gentle exercise is an excellent idea for a pregnant woman. It becomes harder and harder for her to do the closer she gets to the due date, and her motivation may be lacking. Suggest taking her for a walk, or drive together somewhere scenic, and then walk. Once the baby comes you will really miss the quiet time you spent together just talking, so make the most of this now.

If she is past her due date, walking may also bring on labour, so this is even more reason to get going.

#3 To a day spa

You can attend the day spa with her if you like, or just drive her there, pay for it, and then come and get her afterwards.

Pregnant women give up a lot of things; alcohol, coffee, ham sandwiches, sushi, sitting in hot tubs, all of their normal wardrobe, and sleeping on their front. A massage, pedicure or facial is a luxurious treat that she still can have, and she deserves it, so surprise this incredible woman and take her there.

#4 To her obstetric appointments

This one is vital. You don’t have to go to every single one; discuss this with your partner and see what she thinks. There are a lot of them and most of them are really boring. But definitely go to the first appointment with her and meet the obstetrician, and raise any questions or concerns you may have. Go to any scans or ultrasounds. If she is worried about something, go with her.

Oh, and if she wants you to go to pre-natal classes, do this too. These are actually really educational. And if you’ve never been there before, go at least once to the hospital and figure out where the labour ward is.

#5 To Centrelink

This is the very worst thing about becoming a parent. Even the cleverest of people are struck dumb by the complex application process for parental benefits from Centrelink. There are about 17 different things you could qualify for, and every little bit will help, so get applying.

Do this as early in the pregnancy as you can, while you both have some patience and sanity. DO NOT make her do this step by herself; no one deserves that.

#6 To get expensive ice cream

This one has a number of benefits to it. Your pregnant partner deserves the very best of what ever she wants right now, and it’s a really good idea to keep her as happy as you can. It may help to chill her out (see what I did there), as pregnant women get hellishly hot, like the little incubators that they are.

Another excellent reason is that she has to give up soft serve because of the possible bacteria in the machines; so take her to get the good stuff instead.

#7 On a babymoon (or any kind of date night really)

I repeat; life will never be the same again. You and your partner will never have the same amount of time together as a couple after your baby is born.

So a wonderful idea is to go on a babymoon, and have a last indulgent holiday before the storm arrives. Even if a holiday is a budget stretch, plan some good quality date nights for the two of you now.

#8 To the bedroom

The bedroom is an awesome place. You can take your partner there and get some other kinds of couple alone time that you will also miss a lot once the baby arrives. Particularly in the middle trimester you might find your partner taking your hand and dragging you into the bedroom.

And if she’s not up for sexy time, maybe just cuddle and sleep. You are definitely going to miss sleep, so get it now.

#9 Out for spicy food

This one is another recommendation for if she is past her due date; like a gentle walk, a spicy meal can help get labour started. Or you might just find that she’s craving exotic food combinations, so a good curry might satisfy what she needs.

#10 Anywhere she wants

Or, just anywhere she asks you to go. At times she may seem unreasonable, or at times she may seem like a whole different person to the one you impregnated, but if she wants you to take her somewhere, maybe just do it. This is never not good advice.